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Don't say to security

The Top 10 Things You Should Not Say To A Security Guard When Caught Stealing Coins From A Mall Fountain

  1. "Isn't there a robbery at the Orange Julius you should be investigating?"

  2. I'm searching for a hard to find 1998 nickel."

  3. "DUH!! The Gap is having a sale!"

  4. "Did you know that it now costs 35 cents to make a phone call?"

  5. "Thanks idiot...I had just made a wish that I could clean the fountain out and not get caught! Way to ruin that wish!!"

  6. "Have you seen that really cool gumball machine in the food court? It rolls down a spiral ramp!"

  7. "I'm at the last level of Mortal Kombat IV and I need another quarter."

  8. "I'm trying to match the exact amount of your worthless paycheck you Barney Fife wannabe!"

  9. "See..I need a quarter to make a phone call to my Kleptomaniacs Anonymous sponsor and that's why I'm stealing the quarters in the fountain. I NEED HELP MAN!!!"

  10. "Ummmm...I'm looking for beer money?"

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