Computer Jokes

Humorous Computer-Related Acronyms


IBM


I Blame Microsoft


Idiots Buy Me


Idiots Building Machines


I'll Buy Macintoshes


It Bit Me


It Built Microsoft


It's Better Manually


I've Been Mislead


I've Been Mugged




WINDOWS


Well, It Never Does Operate With Speed


When I Need Data Output Without Speed


While Idle, Needs DX or WorkStation


Will Install Needless Data On Whole System




WIN


Whoppingly Immense NOP


Worm Infestation Netware


MS-WINDOWS NT / WINDOWS NT


My Solitaire With Its New De-accelerator, Only With Some Network Technology


Well Intended, Netword De-accelerator, Only Works Sometimes, Never Totally


WINDOWS (as a) Network Trojan




Different Operating Systems Expectations


Macintosh: What You See Is What You Get


MS-DOS: You Asked For It, You Got It


UNIX: IfUHv2sk, UDntWnt2Kno


VMS: You Got It, All Of It, Want It Or Not




Random Abbreviations for Many Computer Companies


APPLE: Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity


DEC: Dump Everything and Close


DEC: Do Expect Cuts


HCL: Hilarious Computer Logic


HP: Hot Pursuit


IBM: I Blame Microsoft


MAC: Most Absurd Computer


MACINTOSH: Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs


MICROSOFT: Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers


NEXT: Now EXchange for Trash


OS/2: Obsolete Soon, Too.


WARP: What A Rot Program




Acronymns for Other Computer Terms:


AMIGA: A Merely Insignificant Game Addiction


BASIC: Bill's Attempt to Seize Industry Control


CD-ROM: Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months


COBOL: Completely Obsolete Business Oriented Language


DOS: Defective Operating System


ISDN: It Still Does Nothing


LISP: Lots of Infuriating & Silly Parenthesis


MIPS: Meaningless Indication of Processor Speed


PCMCIA: People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms


PENTIUM: Produces Erroneous Numbers Through Incorrect Understanding of Mathematics


SCSI: System Can't See It


WWW: World Wide Wait