Computer Jokes

I work as a systems administrator, and part of m job involves answering questions about computers. I generally like my job, but sometimes it gets on my nerves. When people ask me what I find so irritating, this is what I tell them:


Imagine that you are a salesperson for Ikea (substitute "furniture store" if you don't know what "Ikea" is). You get a phone call that goes like this.


Customer: I'd like to buy a kitchen table.


You: That's fine; we have many styles of kitchen tables, I'm sure you can find one you like.


C: I need one that's 3 feet by 5 feet and has a butcher block top.


Y: Yes, we have a table like that. You can pick it up today.


C: OK, how can I get it back to my house?


Y: Well, it comes disassembled, so you can just put it on a roof rack. We can loan you a roof rack if you don't have one.


C: But how do get there?


Y: We're just off exit 25 of the Turnpike. Where are you coming from?


C: Wait, wait, you're going way too fast for me. I have a Ford in my driveway, and the keys are in my hand. What do I do next?


And, whatever you say at this point, the response is always the same:


C: But all I want is a kitchen table! Why does it have to be so *COMPLICATED*!