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Addicted to the Web
(Sung to the tune of "Winter Wonderland")
  
Doorbell rings, I'm not list'nin', 
From my mouth, drool is glist'nin', 
I'm happy -- although 
My boss let me go -- 
Happily addicted to the Web. 
All night long, I sit clicking, 
Unaware time is ticking, 
There's beard on my cheek, 
Same clothes for a week, 
Happily addicted to the Web!
  
  
Friends come by; they shake me, Saying, "Yo, man! 
Don't you know tonight's the senior prom?" 
With a listless shrug, I mutter "No, man; 
I just discovered laugh-a-lot-dot-com!" 
I don't phone, don't send faxes, 
Don't go out, don't pay taxes, 
Who cares if someday 
They drag me away? 
I'm happily addicted to the Web!
  
Happ-ilyyyyy, ad-dict-eeeed to the Weeeeeb!!! (Yeah!)
  
         
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