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* Welcome to the Laughing Gas Newsletter! *
* A free and clean comedy newsletter sent *
* to e-mail subscribers five times a week *
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*   Vol. 5, Issue 7: Tue, Sep. 05, 2000   *
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* Joke newsletter issued by Aha! Jokes

# I N  T O D A Y ' S  I S S U E

1. Diving in the water
2. Warranty on knives

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# J O K E S  F O R  T O D A Y

1. Diving in the water

One day a diver was enjoying the aquatic world
twenty ft below sea level. He noticed a guy at
the same depth he was, but he had on no scuba
gear whatsoever. 

The diver went below another 20 ft, but the guy
joined him a few minutes later. The diver went
down to 60 ft, but minutes later, the same guy
joined him. This confused the diver, so he took
out a waterproof chalk-and-board set, and wrote,
"How the heck are you able to stay under this
deep without equipment?" 

The guy took the board and chalk, erased what
the diver had written, and wrote, "I'M DROWNING,
YOU MORON!"

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2. Warranty on knives

I bought a set of Ginzu knives for only three
easy payments of $29.95 and they came with a
lifetime guarantee. When the handles fell off,
I returned the knives with my lifetime guarantee
asking for a refund. 

They wrote back saying, "The guarantee was for
the lifetime of the knives. Obviously, the
knives are dead, so the guarantee is no longer
valid."

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# S I T E  L I N K S

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