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Clinton Administration Medical Dictionary

Acute: Opposite of an ugly


Artery: The study of paintings


Bacteria: Back door of a cafeteria


Barium: What doctors do to dead patients


Benign: What you are after you're eight.


Bowel: Letter like A,E,I,O, or U


Cat scan: Searching for a kitty


Cauterize: Made eye contact with her


Cesarean Section: Neighborhood in Rome


Colic: A sheep dog


Concussion: A prisoner's sofa


Congenital: To be friendly


D & C: Where the White House is


Dilate: To live too long


Enema: Not a friend


Fester: Quicker


Fibula: A small lie


GI series: A soldier ball game


Hangnail: A coat hook


Impotent: Distinguished, well known


Jaundice: To include in a group


Kinesthetics: Relationships among relatives


Labor pain: Getting hurt at work


Leper: A wild cat


Malaria: Shopping place


Medical staff: A doctor's cane


Morbid: A higher bid


Nitrates: Cheaper than day rates


Node: Was aware of


Outpatient: A person who fainted


Pelvis: A cousin of Elvis


Post-operative: A letter carrier


Recovery room: A place used for upholstery work.


Rectum: It almost killed him


Rheumatic: Amorous


Secretion: Hiding something


Seizure: A Roman emperor


Serology: Study of English Knighthood


Tablet: A small table


Terminal illness: Getting sick at the airport


Tumor: More than one


Urine: Opposite of you're out


Varicose: Nearby


Vein: Conceited