Location: Clean Jokes > Fun Pages > I Don't Want Any MSG!

Enter your E-MAIL address BELOW for JOKES by E-MAIL once a WEEK!

Sponsored Links

Laugh Links
- Funny Jokes
- Funny Cartoons
- Random Jokes
- Fun Pages
- Funny Videos
- Funny Forwards
- Funny Audio
- Fun Downloads
- Funny Links
> Featured Today
- What's new?
- Joke of the Day
- Funny Pic of Day
> Other Options
- Link to Us
- Submit a Joke is proud to present...

I Don't Want Any MSG in That Food!

I Don't Want Any MSG!

Adventures at the Chinese Restaurant...

SCENE: A table at a chinese restaurant. A patron has just been seated. The restaurant is being run by an oriental family. The waiter has a heavy oriental accent.

I Don't Want Any MSG!
Man: Hi! You must be the waiter.

Waiter: Yes, sir! How may I serve you?

Man: I'm hungry today! What's today's special?

Waiter: At this establishment, *everything* is special *everyday*!

Man: Ha, ha. Right. (looks at the menu.) Can't make up my mind.

Waiter: Would you like some soup of the day?

Man: What's the soup of the day?

Waiter: Bird drop soup. I go get bowl for you.

The waiter leaves and returns with a steaming bowl of soup.

Waiter: Here you go! Soup of the day!

Man: Great. (Takes a sip.) (Spits) Yuck! This soup tastes spoiled!

Waiter: Ha, ha! Soup of the day ... did not say from *which* day!

Man: Yuck, yuck! You seem to think that was funny! You must be the waiter!

Waiter: Yes! And, you are the customer. How may I help you?

Man: May I see a menu, please?

Waiter: Sure. Menu on counter. Next to cash register.

Man: Well, aren't you going to get it?

Waiter: Why? You need it, I don't!

Man: But, aren't you the waiter?

Waiter: Yes, and you are the customer! How may I serve you?

Man: Just get me the menu!

Waiter: Okay, okay ...

The waiter leaves and returns with a menu.

I Don't Want Any MSG!
Waiter: Okay, here menu. Now, what you like to order?

Man: Let's see. I think I'll have the beef chow fun.

Waiter: Ah! Beef chow fun! You want to have some fun! Ha, ha! Get it? Have some *fun*?

Man: Man, you have a terrible sense of humor! You must be the waiter!

Waiter: Yes, and you must be the customer! How may I serve you?

Man: May I have my order of fun, please?

Waiter: We don't serve fun here. Not that kind of business.

Man: What?

Waiter: My daughter is *waitress*, not for fun ...

Man: No!! I mean the kind of fun in the kitchen ... in the wok!

Waiter: Ugh! Fun in the wok! You americans are *very* strange!

Man: No, no! Look, I want that order of beef chow fun!

Waiter: Ah, you want CHOW fun!

Man: That's what I said!

Waiter: So sorry. You are the customer.

Man: You are the waiter.

Waiter: How may I serve you?

Man: Just get me my order.

Waiter: No problem.

The waiter walks toward the order window.

Waiter: One order beef chow fun!

Man: Oh, waiter! No MSG!

Waiter: One order beef chow fun! Hold MSG!

Cook: Two order beef chow fun! One no MSG!

Waiter: No! ONE order beef chow fun! No MSG!

Cook: You say TWO order beef chow fun! One no MSG!

Waiter: No! I say one order beef chow fun, then I say no MSG!

Cook: No, you say one order beef chow fun, and one order beef chow fun, no MSG! That TWO order beef chow fun, one no MSG!

Waiter: Look ... I only want ONE order beef chow fun, okay?

Cook: Any MSG?

Waiter: No!

Cook: (mumbles) Nobody like MSG. Don't know why. Taste good. Maybe make you a little nervous, but so does coffee ...

The waiter returns to the table.

Waiter: Cook cook your order now. Anything else?

Man: Let me look at the menu. (Looks at the menu) Hey, waiter! What's this on the menu?

Waiter: (Looks at the menu) Look like food.

Man: That's disgusting! Don't you guys clean your menus?

Waiter: Why?

Man: Well ... uh, I don't know. What is it?

Waiter: Look like chow fun.

Man: Really? Hmmm.

The man pulls the fragment of chow fun off the menu and EATS it.

I Don't Want Any MSG!
Man: Mmmm! That's pretty good chow fun!

Waiter: That BEEF chow fun! You like?

Man: Yes. It was very tasty. I can't wait for my order now.

Waiter: How you know of chow fun?

Man: What do you mean?

Waiter: Most people order rice, noodles, egg roll, won ton ... but YOU order chow fun! You chinese?

Man: Yes, as a matter of fact.

Waiter: You from China? What part of China you from?

Man: Oakland.

Waiter: Ahh! Oakland not in China!

Man: Try telling that to my parents.

Cook: Order ready! One beef chow fun, no MSG!

Waiter: Here you are! One beef chow fun!

Man: Thanks. Wait. Why is there a spoon? Where's my chopsticks?

Waiter: Chow fun usually side dish. We serve with spoon.

Man: Well, I suppose I can use the spoon. Hey, what's this side dish?

Waiter: (Looks at the little dish) Don't know. Hey, cook!! Come out here!

The cook returns to the table.

I Don't Want Any MSG!
Cook: Yeah?

Man: What's this white powder on this side dish?

Cook: Oh! That MSG.

Man: I said NO MSG.

Cook: I know. That why I put on side dish. In case you change your mind.

Man: I WON'T change my mind! I don't like MSG!

Cook: Look. Little bit of MSG, no hurt. Eat 5 gallon MSG, then maybe hurt.

Man: Well, I've heard people reacted strangely to it ...

Cook: (Angry) Look! I eat it! Prove to you that MSG a-okay!

The cook takes a heaping spoonful of MSG and swallows it.

Cook: (Smiles.) See? Nothing wrong! Everything okay.

The cook stops smiling. Suddenly, the cook falls to the ground and shakes uncontrollably.

Man: Uh-oh. Maybe we should get a doctor.

Waiter: No. He just on his break. He be okay in one hour.

Man: You guys are nuts. Just leave me alone.

Cook: (Gasps) I ... need ... water!

Waiter: You customer?

Cook: No.

Waiter: You not customer, I no serve you.

Man: May *I* have some water?

Waiter: You customer?

Man: Yes. Are you a waiter?

Waiter: Yes, how may I serve you?

Man: I want some water.

Waiter: Sorry. I'm on my break.

Man: All right. Who will be serving me?

Waiter: My daughter. The waitress.

I Don't Want Any MSG!
The waiter leaves and his daughter, the waitress goes to the table. She is GORGEOUS ...

Man: YOU'RE the waitress?

Waitress: Yes, you are customer?

Man: Yeah.

Waitress: How may I serve you?

Man: I want some more fun.

Waitress: (slaps the patron) I'm not that kind of girl!

Man: (Sighs) Just get me another order of beef chow fun.

Cook: (From the floor) No MSG!


Site navigation

Search for Jokes by Keyword

Copyright © 2014 Aha! Jokes LLC. Reproduction in part or whole strictly prohibited. Use subject to terms.
[ Jokes | Corporate Center | Advertise | Contact Us ]